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"If you love me, you will keep my commandments." (John 14:15) We all have physical and emotional needs we want our spouse to meet. One of Dawna's emotional needs is to be heard. The third child of four, she grew up the unheard daughter, the third child no one listened to. In our marriage, she doesn't want Mark to try to solve her problem, she doesn't want him to tell her that everything is okay, and she definitely does not want him to defend or excuse himself if his actions a

Mark was trying to be more romantic. When Dawna came home from the office she was drained by an afternoon of client sessions, the kids were at friends, Mark was cooking dinner, and he greeted her with, "Honey, I drew you a bubble bath, now go get in before it gets cold. You can soak while I finish dinner." Dawna was tired. She was hungry. She was irritable. And she hated soaking in water. Mark and the kids were swimmers and soakers. She was not, and after decades of marriage

We have a friend, a priest, who has a crucial first question he asks every couple that sits down with him to begin marriage preparation: "Why do you want to be married in the Church?" Many are surprised when he tells them that their first answer, the one that comes most readily, "because we are in love," might be true, but its incomplete. People who want to marry because they fell in love don't need to marry in the Church. People in love marry in courthouses by Justices of th